49=49

49=49

This is a post about value.

This is a post about human life.

A friend of mine just lost her newborn baby.
Another friend is spending his days with his mom in hospice.
All of a sudden life seems fragile and death is real.

And death, and the void, the hole, that it leaves behind, stands as a heartbreaking reminder of the value of a life.  That behind the numbers are humans, heartbeats, people.

I claim to be pro-life.
That term has been so hijacked by the political world so I want you to hear what I'm actually saying before you assume what I stand for.  I say that I claim to be because sometimes I feel like I fall so hopelessly short.
Pro-life is... Knowing that each life has value from the moment of conception until natural death.
The value of a life is not for me to give, not for you to give, and not for the law to give, but has been given by the Creator.  He created us in his own image and likeness- each life.

But as I watch the news or hear a story, I know in my heart that I do not value each life as God does because sometimes it is just a number to me.

Dear Orlando,
49 lives = 49 lives
Let me not just see a number.
I'm sorry this has taken months to write this down.
My friend hung up the photo on the fridge of the 49 men and women murdered at Pulse for 2 months, and every week I was reminded that behind the number are 49 faces.  49 lives with 49 families, 49 sets of hopes, 49 sets of heartache too.  49 people created by God.  49 people prayed for and mourned for.

Still with all I know and believe, I struggle to value each human life.   I know that sounds awful but I'm just being honest.  With all of the death and suffering that litters our news, I notice that I struggle against my tendency to assign arbitrary and unequal value to life.  I find myself valuing lives of people who are most like me.  I hate even admitting to myself that my heart is that ugly.  Do I not mourn  over  the death of an American more than the nameless refugee?

"Are not two sparrows sold for a penny?  And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father.  But even the hairs of your head are all numbered.  Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows."           Matthew 10:29-31

And so I declare value, that 49=49, even as I struggle, and ask God to help me see each person as a person, with equal value and dignity.  Jesus, help me stand for life.  Teach me to mourn, to serve, to love, to build.

49 mothers killed by cancer
= 49 people shot in a gay nightclub in Orlando

=49 unborn babies aborted in the next half hour
= 49 babies who die as their mothers hold them

= 49 Syrian men and women beheaded brutally
= 49 young men and women killed by drug overdose

= 49 people dying of AIDS in Botswana
= 49 people dying of heart disease in Massachusetts

= 49 names of soldiers killed in war
= 49 people whose nameless bodies are in a mass grave

=49 pregnant women in crisis without support
= 49 people after a hurricane without a home

= 49 adults with autism in a group home
= 49 doctors and lawyers and researchers

= 49 black people killed by police
= 49 police officers

= 49 orphans sleeping on a concrete floor tonight
= 49 of my own family

Lord I know you see the value.  You see 49.
Whether or not we are wanted by others, whether or not we are accepted in the churches, whether or not anyone will miss us or remember us when we die, whether or not we have a voice.
You value each life,
And may you open my eyes and heart to do the same.

49=49